Did you hear about the 2 gay ghosts, they keep putting the willies up each other. Paddy apply for a job, and the interviewer tells him he has to pass a simple test, ok says paddy no problem, Interviewer says "name 2 days of the week beginning with T" he thinks for a minute an says Today and Tomorrow. Chap goes into opticians, and says Can I have an eye test as I can't see very far. Course you can and optician takes him outside and says "what's that in the sky" chap looks up and says It's the sun. Optician says P*** off how far do you want to see. Woman goes for eye test, optician tells her to go behind screen and take her top and bra off. She protests but eventually does it. Optician comes in and lifts up left breast and asks if she can see a hole in her nipple, no she says he lifts up other breast and asks same question, no she says. Right so he gets his Todger out and says Can you see a hole in that. Yes she says as plain as day. He says to her Right eye is over, and my conclusion is that you are cockeyed.