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Fan of Big Tone

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Posts posted by Fan of Big Tone

  1. It's very interesting to hear it from your perspective @Chris thanks for taking the time to explain, I guess what works for you might not work for others though. It's all about individuals.

    It's a subject I'm interested in and maybe we could talk about this sometime over a pint? You're paying. :joker:

    As a matter of interest, how would you deal with this situation. You see someone standing on a platform and they look as if they are about to jump in front of the next train. I would go up to them and say "Are you OK mate, can I help" in the hope that would break their thoughts and they might open up to me.

  2. 2 minutes ago, Chris said:

    There's better ways to show that people care, it's a very generic question.

    People who suffer from depression don't often ask for anything, especially not help. I am a prolific person on many platforms such as Reddit, Twitter and I consider reaching out to be very important. I know what you mean but what I try to do is educate people on what they could do - instead of the obvious. It's very unlikely someone would turn around and say 'I'm not okay, this is happening etc'.

    Especially after a conversation has been started with 'are you okay?'.

    You might not think it's the same thing but a lot of people would who suffer would. 

    But surely if you are starting a conversation with someone who you think might be depress and saying "are you ok, you seem down, can I help?" it shows you care and want to help, as I say everyone is different and I'm not expert and I don't (thankfully) suffer from depression but if asking those questions don't help then what would help?

  3. 58 minutes ago, Chris said:

    Speaking from experience, I never admit to how I truly feel and people repeatedly asking if I'm okay - when the obvious signs are that I am not simply make me feel worse.

    It actually irritates me a lot.

    Would people ask an alcoholic if they want a drink of beer for example?

    I realise some can hide it, I do this very well but people who truly know me see the difference. Withdrawal is a big thing, not talking is either - I feel people need to understand and spot the signs.

    The best thing to do is to try and speak about something which both parties have a common interest, then allow for time - eventually people will open up as I do. I feel it's important to stress people should be trustworthy and non judgemental, feelings are what often pushes someone to the edge and sometimes those that pretend to be there for people are actually very malicious. This makes it harder for someone who's depressed to open up or even trust another person.

    Sorry I don't think asking an alcoholic if he wants a beer is the same thing at all. If someone is feeling depressed and you ask them if they are ok it's showing that they care and it may enable them to open up and talk about what is troubling them, you can also ask if there is anything you can do to help, tell them you care and you are there for them.

    Of course everyone is different and people react in different ways and can lash out at people trying to help, none of us are experts but just showing you care in whatever way you can may make a huge difference.

    • Confused 1
  4. Maybe we should have kept it since the present scoreboard doesn't work any more.

    For those that don't remember or are too young the letters corresponded with letters printed in the programme for matches being played e.g. Liverpool v Arsenal might be letter A, there used to be a man up there who's job it was to put the numbers to tell us the half time scores so Liverpool were winning 1-0 he'd put a one on the left hand side of the window marked A and a 0 on the right hand side.

    Of course the Notts fans always wanted to know the Florist half time score so when he got to their score he used to have a little game, if it was 2-0 for instance he'd put the 2 up and keep swapping it to keep us guessing whether Florist had scored two or the opposition had.


    • Like 1
  5. I think he needs to turn it round pretty quickly, I'm not one for sacking managers every five minutes but I don't want Notts to finish in the bottom two either, I wish I could see some light at the end of the tunnel but I can't at the moment, maybe when Stead and Hemmings come back things will get better, I really hope so. This was supposed to be our promotion season, we were the bookies favourites pre season, Alan Hardy must be absolutely gutted at the way things have turned out.

  6. I went up to our local memorial today to watch the parade and wreath laying, I was frankly amazed at how many people were there, I live in a small town but there were literally hundreds paying their respects and it was very humbling to see. It's a long time since I've watched a remembrance service in fact the last time was when my boys were in the Boys Brigade and marching so it was good to go today.

    • Like 1
  7. Totally agree with this, I'm also here if anyone wants to chat. My son took his own life, he couldn't open up, I wish he had, I wish when he was at his lowest someone would have said "Are you OK", do you want to talk". Talking about things is better than bottling it up, even if you don't get answers it will be a release to get things off your chest.


    • Like 2
  8. Good morning PoN, it’s a cloudy, rainy start here and a bit cool. It’s Remembrance Day and the day when we take time to remember the brave people who died so that we could live in freedom.

    We’ve had our two grandsons overnight but they’ve been as good as gold which we are glad about because we were exhausted after our use day yesterday.

    They are being picked up soon because George is marching with the scouts for Remembrance Day.

    Have a great day everyone.

    • Like 2
  9. 6 hours ago, Magic magpie said:

    This was a very interesting read I’ve got to say  .. it’s sounds daft the but the British Legion is some I’ve come to respect and appreciate.. when my grandad needed help they were more than happy to help from equipment to a ramp to help have a quality of life. When we lost him they sent some to funeral to represent them and pay there respects all for nothing but we made a donation. I know this has been for countless other service men and there families it’s a charity that some people if they hadn’t have helped would have been in trouble. But reading the wages story and the servicemen who don’t get help that angers me a lot because with that salary they pay him/her they could help so many more than they do... this is a proud British charity I’ve respect for and tomorrow in the remembrance service they will do the veterans proud .. but wages they pay is out rages I can’t get over that.. so many volunteer for the respect and honour and then the people who take the salary could half it and still live well and put the rest  back in 

    It’s nice to hear the story about your grandad and how the British Legion helped him @Magic magpie I’ve never actually heard of anyone who has benefitted from the charity so it’s good to hear a first hand experience but I do agree about the wages it makes me laugh when I hear of people’s exhorbitant wages who work for a charity, if they really cared about the charity they’d take less. Fair enough if they are working full time for the charity they need a wage to be able to live but some of the salaries are ridiculously high.

  10. I came out of the event I’d been to and on the way home I switched the radio on just in time to hear the third goal go in so I switched straight back off again.

    Let’s face it we didn’t really expect to win did we? But if I’m honest some teams of the past would have made a better fist of it, last seasons team would certainly have done better.

    However it is what it is and it looks like we are going to have a serious battle to avoid relegation I hope Kewell and the players are up for the fight because right now it’s not looking good.

    • Like 1
  11. Good morning PoN it’s matchday, it’s going to be a busy day for me so I won’t be able to listen to the commentary because me and Mrs Big Tone are going To a volunteers conference at a hotel in Derby, we will be learning all about the workings of the charity we do voluntary work for and meeting other volunteers, it will be informative but tiring I expect. To be honest I’ll be glad when it’s over I’m not good at meeting and talking to people.

    When we get back we are having our two youngest grandchildren for the night, while their parents have a date night.

    I’ll try to get on here later if I can, meanwhile have a great day, let us know what you’re up to and COME ON YOU PIES!!

  12. 11 minutes ago, hissingdwarf said:

    Well deserved imo. Especially when you rea some of the excuses he has come out with. 

    I totally agree, in fact I think he should have been banned for longer, he’s a serial speeder and seems to think the law doesn’t apply to him.

    Speeding costs lives and while everyone may speed unwittingly at some time or other there’s no excuse for constantly flouting the limits.

    • Like 3
  13. An interesting article and he makes some good points about the wages of the people who run the British Legion, also of course the homelessness in this country is an appalling statistic whether they are veterans or not as is the mental health situation, however I don't believe the British Legion should involve itself in politics at all.

  14. It’s be typical of Notts to go and nick this it depends on the players attitudes, if Barnsley make changes and their players turn up thinking it’s an easy game then if Notts players turn up detetermined to fight for every ball and everything clicks into place we could cause an upset.

    There are a lot of ifs there but who knows?

  15. Good morning it’s a cloudy start here. I had a better nights sleep than the night before when I was tossing and turning for hours. 

    Today will be a relaxing day, we haven’t got a lot on except preparing for a full day course we are going on tomorrow, its for our voluntary work and is at a posh hotel in Derby with lunch thrown in but it’ll be a bit intense I think.

    We aren’t having our customary curry tonight because we don’t want to smell of curry tomorrow, so we are having trout cooked in a parcel.

    Later I’ll watch the cup match on BBC 1 can’t remember who’s playing but it’s a non league club. Have a great day everyone.

    • Like 1
  16. 20 minutes ago, cheeky~k8 said:

    Today has been abit of an indoor day for me, i have been sorting out appointments and planning a few things.

    After picking my girls up from school and after school club, me and Ava made her viking longhouse model for a school project over the half term. Adults were able to help. We never got round to it over the holidays but shes now very excited to hand it in tomorrow morning.

    That reminds me of a model me and my dad made when I was a kid, the teacher wanted a model of a mountain showing contour lines, my dad had the bright idea of making it out of concrete and I painted the contours, it weighed a ton, I took it to school and the teacher took one look at it threw it and threw it in the bin. :panic:


  17. 13 minutes ago, Joshua said:

    He was subbed because he had ran himself to the ground, not because he didn't score or because he didn't do well. He was one of Oldham's better players.

    Ross Fitzsimons did play quite well.

    If a professional footballer is fully fit he should be able to last 90 minutes, I don’t get the idea that he “ran himself into the ground” but as I say maybe he wasn’t fully fit or had just come back from injury I don’t know. If he was fully fit obviously his manager didn’t think he was one of their better players or he wouldn’t have subbed him.

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