This little lad and his Mum go to the pictures and they sit down in front of a courting couple, anyway the film starts and the little lad starts looking over his shoulder at the guy and his girlfriend sitting behind him and his Mum., His Mum whispers turn round and watch the film, which he does for a few minutes, then he peeps over his shoulder at the couple again and once again his Mum tells him to turn round and watch the film. Then for the third time the kid looks behind him and his Mum says I wont tell you again, if you turn round one more time I'm taking you home. The Kid looks at his Mum and says can I tell you what they're talking about Mum? Certainly not replies his Mum. Well they were only talking about Soap. Soap? says his Mum. Yeah replies the Kid. He said Put this in Your Palm Olive and she said Not on Your Life Boy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Son and me were just leaving our Local when we heard a squeal of brakes a car's horn and an exchange of swear words. What had happened a Drunk had staggered out of the  Pub straight into the road, and had been missed being hit by a car by an hair's breath. No sooner had the Drunk got back on the pavement he only turns round and staggers back into the road again. Once again he's just misses being ran over. He stood there swearing and sticking two fingers up at the driver. Hey Pal my Son shouts There's a Zebra Crossing a short way up the road. Well I hope it'd having better Luck than me said the Drunk.