Wheelbarrow repair man

My Son and me were just leaving our Local when we heard a squeal of brakes a car's horn and an exchange of swear words. What had happened a Drunk had staggered out of the Pub straight into the road, and had been missed being hit by a car by an hair's breath. No sooner had the Drunk got back on the pavement he only turns round and staggers back into the road again. Once again he's just misses being ran over. He stood there swearing and sticking two fingers up at the driver. Hey Pal my Son shouts There's a Zebra Crossing a short way up the road. Well I hope it'd having better Luck than me said the Drunk.

Dangerous Sausage we have a Manager/ Head Coach who is out of his depth and we have players Not Up To League 2 Standard on two to three year contracts that's why Notts Need A Complete Clear Out and Re build during the Summer off season. Or the Magpies Could Be Heading Back To The National League. Nuff Said.

Robbie The more this Debate goes on the more it seems Fans are starting to come up with similar thoughts and ideas about Notts (well at least we do). The Notts C.E.O. stated before the January Transfer window that the club didn't need to sell players and hopefully, that is still the case however a decent offer coming in for our top players may be to difficult to refuse and I wouldn't think the Owners would stand in the way of say Macca from improving his footballing career in League 1 or the Championship. Then again the Club shouldn't let our top three go for a give away price. The sum of £1.5 million was banded about being how much Macca was worth, which is a Total Insult , reading about Premier League clubs offering to buy untried teenagers for £100 million, then Macca must be worth between £3-5 million. He is after all a proven goal scorer and will score goals at any level (Even the Premier) as long as his new Club play to his strengths. Both Jodi and Dan ( on current transfer payments) must be worth a £1 million a piece. Anybody reading this will think I've has gone off my rocker, but think on this, there are Championship Clubs who pay over the top for mediocre foreign players an example of which cost Forest in the region of £10 million No Names. At least other Clubs can see what Macca, Jodi and Dan can do and they Don't Need Time To Adjust To The English Game. So £5-£7 million would enable Notts to invest in players to take the Magpies to the next level. Yes a New Head Coach needs to be part of the Recruitment side of the Club. At the moment it's just this player seems right for the Squad, so we've signed him, Now You get on with Coaching him. That is Wrong. The idea of a Director of Football is something I've been banging on about in other comment sections on PON for a while. Because of all the Backlash Stuart Maynard as been receiving I've stated a number of times get Neil Warnock back at the Lane in the Director of Football position his wealth of Footballing Knowledge and his Vast Experience could help with Maynard's transition into a Full Time Coach. Unfortunately it seems the Club have missed that Opportunity, But Never Say Never.

Giving your question regarding Stuart Maynard more thought Robbie, another worrying point is will the Brothers admit to their mistake in hiring Maynard? Because lets face facts their previous gamble regarding Head Coach appointment Ian Burchnall his tenure at the Lane didn't start out all that good either. Will they persist with Maynard hoping he'll come good or bite the Bullet and realize they made mistake and let him go? If it's the former and Notts fail to make any progress at the start of 2024/2025 season this may cause a drop in Season Ticket Sales and they then could be a Mad Rush finding a New Coach and the wrong guy again may be hired, resulting in a season long Battle trying to avoid Relegation. I think it's time for a Fresh start at Notts during the up coming off season, a New Head Coach needs to be appointed along with a New Head of Recruitment and the Squad rebuilt it will cost money, but this will benefit Notts in the Long Term. Macca Jodi Jones Dan Crowley David McGoldrick Matt Palmer Scott Robertson Lewis Macari Cedwyn Scott Jatta Sam Austin Geraldo Bajrami Luther Manakandafa James Sanderson and Tiernan Brookes. Are (in my opinion) worth holding on to, however the first three will probably be signed by teams higher in the Football Pyramid and the last three should be promoted from the Youth Squad. Jim O'Brien should be offered a Coaching Roll, the remainder should be released. Admittedly that leaves a Big Hole in the Notts Squad, but with the right Cash injection and a New Head of Recruitment plus the right Head Coach being hired hopefully Better and Happier Times will return to The Lane.

I honestly don't think so Robbie, even if Notts went a mini run till the end of the season (which hand on heart I can't see happening), I don't think Maynard is up to the job ,the Step Up from Part Time Coach to Full Time with Notts as proven To Much for Him. Lets face facts he was brought in because the Brothers thought he would carry on playing the same system that Luke Williams had adopted which had brought so much success last season, and he was playing a similar type of football at Wealdstone. However has it's been stated repeatedly by other Fans and myself on PON Notts were found out you only had to look at the Crushing defeat by Mansfield the Magpies suffered at the Lane to prove something wasn't right. But Williams persisted with his You score 3 and We'll score 4 game plan, once Williams left Jim O'Brien's only match in charge produce a 5-5 draw. Once Maynard came in Not only did he arrive when Notts Faced most of the League's top teams he had to find a way to stop the Magpies leaking Goals but still keep them scoring at the other end. It hasn't happened the Defeats Notts have suffered have drained the players enthusiasm and belief in themselves as proven how good Williams could lift his players (How Fed Up am I writing those words) where as Maynard can't because he's been trying desperately to prove he can hold down his position as Head Coach and his continual tinkering with the line up e.g playing Sam in goal instead of keeping Luca in the Goal Keeping position for the Salford match, and playing players in their wrong positions e.g. Jodi Jones, in my opinion it's been To Much for Maynard, I don't think he can Cope with everything which as and is being thrown at him. Maynard of course must carry most of the blame for Notts lack lustre performances, but he certainly hasn't been helped by the Recruitment Team who's Failure to entice EFL standard defenders to Meadow Lane as also added to the Magpies Woes. And of course the tragic Death of Jason Turner ( as stated by your good self Robbie) must have also had a huge effect on every one connected with the Club. So in the Summer Stuart Maynard needs to be replaced with a Manager/Head Coach who knows this League. A Player who is a Leader on the Pitch must be found and appointed Captain. There are in my opinion 14 players worth keeping at the Lane next season. Three of which will probably be signed by teams higher up the Football Pyramid and three are young players who should be promoted to the senior Squad. And Jim O'Brien should be given a coaching role. Notts need to Re Build completely in the Summer or they could end up looking down the Barrel of a Relegation Gun.

This little lad and his Mum go to the pictures and they sit down in front of a courting couple, anyway the film starts and the little lad starts looking over his shoulder at the guy and his girlfriend sitting behind him and his Mum., His Mum whispers turn round and watch the film, which he does for a few minutes, then he peeps over his shoulder at the couple again and once again his Mum tells him to turn round and watch the film. Then for the third time the kid looks behind him and his Mum says I wont tell you again, if you turn round one more time I'm taking you home. The Kid looks at his Mum and says can I tell you what they're talking about Mum? Certainly not replies his Mum. Well they were only talking about Soap. Soap? says his Mum. Yeah replies the Kid. He said Put this in Your Palm Olive and she said Not on Your Life Boy.

I Agree with some of your points menzinho , but I think the new contracts handed out in the Summer, were done so with the Heart Ruling the Head. As I have stated many times on this site, Luke Williams Man Management skills were much more Superior than Stuart Maynard's and he could get good performances out of mediocre players. Once Williams departed the Rot that had started to set in during the latter part of his tenure spread at an Alarming Rate under Maynard. It is wrong to lay all of Notts problems at Maynard's door, but Football is a Results game and Maynard hasn't got them hence all the backlash from Fans. To be Honest I never read or heard about the players you mentioned that Notts tried to sign. But then again there must have been more than just two Defenders to be looked at? Anyway I expect a Massive Shake Up at the Lane this Summer.

Menzinho The reason why the Recruitment team are being called out is there were No EFL Standard defenders signed in January and in fact the defence as been poor for a Number of seasons. Yes Macari was signed but only because he was getting no where with Stoke and coming to the end of his contract there and he was already at Notts on loan so it was clear he was worth a gamble So one New Defender. Go back over the last few seasons and see who the Recruitment team have signed and you will find a lot more Duds than Gems. Why weren't the Notts players that got the Magpies promoted Not Screened and their Data explored to see, if they were up to League 2 Standard ? The Recruitment team should have all their details on File and must have known, that a vast majority of players were Not Up to playing at this League's Level. So they must accept their share of the Blame for Notts Present Woes. Did they have anything to do with the Hiring of Stuart Maynard? Or was that just down to the Owners?

How many more times? How many more times are Notts going to give away goals at the Death? How many more times is Stuart Maynard going to say, We were the Better team in the First Half. We created Big Moments in the Game. We Performed to a Good Level. Maybe BUT NOTTS STILL LOST. I'm sorry but I'm afraid I'm slowly losing faith in Stuart Maynard Yes we can point to Injuries and Bad Luck on occasions, but the Buck Stops with the Manager/Head Coach. How can the Magpies go to Newport and win 3-1. Then go to Bradford and win 3-0 only to come back to Meadow Lane and lose to teams, they shouldn't be losing too? Even the most Ardent Stuart Maynard supporter must realize deep down he's out of his depth. All the excuses Well it's not his team, he needs time etc etc they just won't wash anymore Two wins and two Draws is it? Under his tenure it's just not good enough, I'm afraid come the Summer he along with the Vast Numbers of the Notts playing Squad need to be gone they are just Not Up To League 2 Standard. And while we're at it Get Rid Of The Recruitment Team, what they are getting paid for is Beyond Me.

The wife reckons I've got the body of a God. She must mean Buddha. Yes you to could have a body like mine. If your Not Careful. I'm a sex symbol for women who don't care. My mate put a small ad in the paper it read. Fat Bloke seeks Super Model with Sense of Humour.

A little Polar Bear cub goes up to his Mum and asks I am a Polar Bear aren't I Mum? I'm not a Black Bear or a Brown Bear or even a Grizzly Bear, I am a Polar Bear? Of course you're your a Polar Bear dear. Why do you ask? Well it's just that I'm Bloody Freezing!! Same little Polar Bear Cub was having great fun with a Seal Pup, sliding on the ice, throwing snowballs at each other, building a snow den laughing having a good time Suddenly the Polar Bear Cub's Mum turns up and says How many times Have I told you Stop Playing With Your Food. How to catch a Polar Bear. First dig a big hole in the Ice. Then put frozen peas all around the hole. Because Polar Bears love Frozen peas (little known fact). Now wait and when the Polar Bear comes down for a Pea, you then sneak up behind it and Kick It In The Ice Hole.

Two young women approach a Scotsman who's wearing a kilt. Excuse me asks one, Is anything worn under the Kilt? No everything is in perfect working order My mate as French ancestry he was telling me that one of his French ancestors invented Gravy. You must have heard about the Count of Monte Bisto. This chap was on stage when he suddenly slipped and fell into the orchestra Pit and went Harp over Oboe. I once went out with a girl who was very posh, How Posh? Well put it this way she'd get out of the bath to have a wee.

They say an Elephant never forgets. But have you ever had a Birthday Card from one? What's the difference between an Elephant's backside and a Post Box? Dunno. No point in sending you with a letter then. How do you stop a herd of changing Elephants ? Make a Trunk call an reverse the charge. Me and my mate Dave were sitting on a Park Bench, when suddenly Dave pulls a can from his inside pocket and starts spraying the air around us. What's that? I asked Elephant repellent he replies. Don't be daft there's No Elephants around here. Shows that it works then.

I can't do dwarf impressions, but Hey Oh. Dipping Ginger nuts used to be great fun. But nowadays it's considered bullying. I was playing football on an airplane and there I was, Running up the wing. I got a letter through the post, Book yourself an Eye Test, in the end I booked two, might as well get the both done at the same time. I bought my Mother-in-Law a brand new chair for her birthday, but can't get her to plug it in. This chap and his mate were in a bar the chap says the Doctor told me I have to take a tablet every day for the rest of my life. His mate well that's not bad. The chap replies he's only given me four. I bought a Brand New pair of tortoise skin shoes. It took me over an hour to get out of the shop. The Post Office have spent £180 million on a machine that can sort 25,000 letters per minute. Then they give them to a bloke on a bike.

Another Poem Little Birdie flying high drops a message from the sky Says a Farmer wiping his eye It's a damn good job Cows can't fly

A Poem A Blackbird sat upon my window how sweetly he did sing, He song told of the end of Winter and the coming of Spring I threw back my bed clothes and tip toed from my bed Gently I closed the window and crushed the noisy bleeders head.

Robbie agreed Williams didn't tinker with anything in my opinion it was Maynard that's done the tinkering, Williams team could only play one way and once Notts were found out he didn't have a plan B. Maynard was hired by the Brothers because he had Wealdstone playing in a similar way and I think they hoped he would continue in the same vein at Notts, however Maynard has quickly found out these tactics don't work in League 2 so he's changed things about, trying to find a solution which hasn't been forthcoming hence the poor results, however if he can get Notts playing as they did for the first 20 minutes in the second half at Bradford (said by some to be the best minutes played by Notts under Maynard) on a constant level for the full 90+ minutes in matches then the Magpies should get back to winning matches on regular basis. As you have said Notts now have no fear of being relegated, so there is nothing stopping the players from going out and expressing themselves and Maynard finding out which of his game plans is best suited for the Magpies to play and Win.

Same line up and same formation, lets just hope SM doesn't start tinkering with things if It Ain't Broke Don't Fix It. I think that may have been one of the problems that has affected SM's transition into the Notts Head Coach, tinkering about trying to copy Luke Williams strategy while attempting to put his own spin on things, Luca Ashby- Hammond also deserves praise in having the foresight to send a long ball forward hence his assist , in other games another Notts keeper would have held on to the ball and started a build up from the back, Luca's quick thinking gave Jatta his chance and boy did he take it. Despite Macca scoring a goal he still seems a little edgy when he broke through the Bradford defence and was one on one with the Keeper he placed the ball were the keeper could save it, earlier in the season Macca would have buried that. A couple of more goals on Saturday will show he's truly back in the groove. Have Notts turned a corner? Maybe but I thought they had with the victory at Newport, so nothing is guaranteed. But 3 points at the Lane on Saturday will enhance the chances of the Magpies getting a top half finish and will boost the players and Most Fans confidence.

I remember one time the wife and I took the kids to our local Zoo, and we were in the retile house when I saw this woman and she was only trying to pet this massive Salt Water Crocodile. What are you doing? I asked That's a Man Eater ! She pulled her hand away Do you mean he'd eat me whole? Well he'd probably spit that out but it will eat the rest of you. I was on a course which meant I had to spend time away from home and I rang up the wife and said I wish I had you here in bed with me, kissing cuddling exploring each other's bodies. She said Who's that speaking? My mate Bernie who is a confirmed Batchelor still lives at home with his Mum. His Mum is 95 and not to steady on her feet, so being the Good Son he is, every morning Bernie carries her down stairs into the kitchen, so she can make him his breakfast. Sitting in a pub with the wife I couldn't help noticing the lines on her face. She saw me looking What's up? She asked Nothing much it's just I've noticed those crow's feet around your eyes. I'll have you know they're laughter lines. No Sweetheart. Nothing's That Funny.

Another plus regarding last night two Notts youngsters Luther Munakandafa and James Sanderson were on the bench, admittedly neither got onto the pitch ( a term used very loosely for Bradford's pitch) but just being part of the Match Day Squad would have done wonders for both lads morale, and hopefully both can gat a couple of games before the season's end.

The Players the Coaching Staff the Fans the Owners and the whole club needed that. Now let us go forward and get 3 more points on Saturday, one match at a time and lets hope the Magpies can build on this evening success. Nice to see Macca back on the score sheet and Jatta appears to be having an excellent spell in the Black & White Stripes lets hope, he can carry on in this vein.

It's Match Day !! And in the words of Doctor Smith from Lost In Space (who remembers that?) Oh The Pain.

Hopefully the result against Accy will have boosted the sagging moral of the Squad and maybe, just maybe will inspire the Notts players on to a victory. My head says a Bradford victory but in my heart Notts grab a late win 1-0 or 2-1, to ease the pressure on Stuart Maynard and the rest of his coaching staff.

This chap was walking around Blackpool, it was his first visit and he was fascinated by the tower he stood there looking up in wonder, when he was approached by a Lady of the Night. She stood next to him and they began chatting she told him that they began building the tower in 1891 and it was first opened to the public in 1894 and when it was first built, it was the tallest structure in the British Empire. Then she leaned in and asked, Do you Fancy a bit? The chap looks at her and says Why are they pulling it down? Same chap was walking along the Blackpool North pier and noticed a Bloke had a long piece of rope on the end of which was a steel bucket, which he dipped into the sea he then hurled the bucket back up and put the collected sea water into a water barrel next to him. What you doing? asks the first Chap. Selling sea water a pound a bucket replies the bloke. I'll take a bucket says the chap passing over a pound. The bloke picks up a kids plastic bucket and fills it with sea water. The first chap thanks him and then spends the rest of the day walking round Blackpool with his bucket of sea water looking at all the sights. About half five he goes back to the north pier, and the tide had gone out and the bloke who had sold him his bucket of sea water was packing up. The chap went up to him and said By Gum you've sold a lot of sea water today.

Doesn't your Mum say daft things to you when you're young things like If you fall out of that tree and break both your legs. Don't come running to me. Your Dad's no better. We were watching a David Attenborough wildlife programme and these two Lions were, well lets just say more than just good friends. What they doing Dad? I asked. Dancing he replied. Dancing the next School Disco I was expelled. I once went out with a Witch we were driving along a dark country lane and she put her on my thigh and I turned into a Layby. Me and the wife went and stayed in a nice boarding house, as we signed in I noticed a sign on the wall. I whispered to the wife that's a bit threatening be in bed before I am. Put your glasses on it says be in bed before One AM.