Wheelbarrow repair man

A Friend of mine went on a one night stand that went horribly wrong. He's been married Three Years Now. Apparently Shop Lifting from the Apple Store is only considered Scrumping. The hardest part in making skimmed Milk is skimming the Cows across the lake. I'm not saying my Mother in Law's got a big mouth, but when she smiles she leaves lipstick on her Ear Lobes.

Lets Enjoy yesterday's Win. I'm pretty sure Stuart Maynard is well aware of Notts short comings (and his own) and will be working on improving the playing system and his own performance in becoming a Full Time Coach, lets hope that things are starting to Fall into place and with an Excellent Recruitment strategy Notts will be able to push on. It's interesting to Note how many times the Recruitment team have been mentioned over the months since the appalling January window , therefore Richard Montague needs to get his Act together and sign Players that can do the job in League 2 and potentially League 1. And lets also hope Stuart Maynard will have a say in which players are signed, because it comes across as that he doesn't it seems the Recruitment team look at the data of a certain player and if he fits the Notts system then he's signed and Stuart Maynard can Like it or Lump it. Having a say in who's signed will also help Stuart Maynard Grow into his Role as Notts Head Coach. This off season may be one of the Most Important down at the Lane in Recent Years and could map out the Magpies future as to weather Notts are going to be a Team that will be one of mid table obscurity or one that can push on into playoff contention or even Automatic Promotion.

Robbie On their Day Notts can beat any team in the League True. The trouble is they didn't do it enough during this season. I think this is still Luke Williams team because most played under him, it will be Maynard's Team once New Players come into the Notts Squad and are able to adopt to his playing system. I think one of the Strange things regarding Maynard's system is Why Did It Take So Long For Players To Adapt To? He was after all Hired by the Brothers because his Coaching and Footballing game plan was similar to LW 's, and I think everyone was hoping for a Smooth transition Club Officials and Fans alike, it seems as Maynard tried to tighten thinks up at the back, the Attack forgot how to score goals, then when he turned his attention back to the Forwards the Defence dropped back into their Old Habits, it now seems (hopefully) Maynard as found a Happy Balance and the team are back to playing has a Unit. It's Not the Finished Article by any means, but with some more New Players with current EFL experience drafted in at the Lane all under 30 years old, then the Magpies future could look very Bright Indeed.

Well that was a Nice surprise, I would have been Happy with a Draw but a 3-1 win certainly would have Helped Stuart Maynard's standing at Notts. On this kind of form the Magpies needn't Fear Stockport on Tuesday Evening. That match however will Determine how much Notts have really improved, but will Stockport be bothered as they have already been Promoted to League 1? I think they will because they'll want to go up as Champions, so any positive Result will give Notts hope for a better season in 2024/2025. Back to Back Wins for Stuart Maynard will have tremendously eased the pressure put on him by the Poor Run Of Results Notts had at the Start of his tenure. It is also interesting to note that players who have been playing poorly, have Suddenly woken up to the fact that maybe their Futures at Notts is on the Line and they are starting to play for the Shirt. But each should be judged on the season as a whole Not just these last few games. I am still in the There Needs To Be A Massive Shake Up At The Lane This Coming Off Season Camp, because if certain players are still relied on by the Club then another season of struggle may be in line for Notts 2024/2025. Recruitment could be the Be All and End All this coming Summer. Because if it's as Poor Defensive wise as it as been for the Past Few Seasons then this could have, a Negative effect on the Magpies Progress for Promotion to League 1.

A Poem Last night I held a little Hand It made my Sad Heart Sing It was the Loveliest Hand I've Ever Held Four Aces and a King.

Do you have a Nickname for your Wife? I have I call her Doll Face. She's very Pretty with an Eye Missing. Back in the day I was a member of a British team which won a Table Tennis Tournament in South Asia. We had a Massive Party to Celebrate, it was a Hong Kong Ping Pong Ding Dong. My Mate collects empty bottles which sounds so much better than Alcoholic. I remember I met my wife in a Library which was Novel.

Do you ever get one of those days when you just can't be bothered? The Wife said to me go outside and see if it's raining. I replied Call the Dog in and see if it's Wet. I've got a mate who is very unlucky. He bought a Jelly Fish and it Set. Jumping to conclusions, is the only exercise the Wife gets. I bought some Rat Poison and asked the shop assistant what do I do with it? She replied You put it round the Rat's hole. I said if I could get that close I'd Hit it with a Brick.

I realise this is a Joke Piethagoram however Being Picky (which I can be) the term Inn can not be used in the Fan Zone name because by Law the term Inn indicates that there are rooms in the building for Patrons to sleep if needed. Well that's me being being a Smarty bottom over for today.

Hey how about Vikings Lodge? In honour of our Danish Owners.

I went into a shop and asked if they Sold Rat Poison. The woman behind the counter said they didn't .Have you tried Boots. I replied I Don't Want To Kick Them To Death. I lent a Mate £10,000 for plastic surgery on his face. Now I can't recognize him to get me money back. Me and a couple of friends were in Caffe we got our meals then the Waiter asked did we wont Salt? Yes please said one mate. The Waiter pulls out a Salt cellar from his left hand pocket and sprinkles it over our meals. Would you like Pepper? asked the Waiter . Yes Please said my other Mate. The waiter took a Pepper Pot out of his right hand pocket and sprinkled it over our meals. I looked at my Friends and said What ever you do Don't Ask For Vinegar. I remember when I was young I'd go out sowing my Wild Oats. Then the following morning I'd be praying for a Crop Failure.

I'll tell you something my Gaffer at work is living proof Snow White and Dopey did have S EX. Red Sky at Night. Light of Shorter wave lengths is being dissipated by Water Vapour and Atmospheric Dust. Red Sky in the Morning Same A friend of mine was telling me that he and his Missus had had a Fairy Tale Wedding. Really? Yeah Grim.

After the game against Harrogate and the 3-0 Victory lets hope Notts don't do what they normally do and go and lose their next match. the only change I'd make from the Harrogate match, I'd play Jodi Jones from the start. Result 2-2 with Goals from Macca and AJ.

This just in there is a rumour that Notts are going to sign an Irish Midfield Wizard he's only a little fella that goes by the name of A Knee Mick. A little lad asks his Dad. Dad where are the Rockies? I Don't Know Son. Dad when was the English Civil War? I Don't Know Son. Dad what the Square Root of 519? I Don't Know Son. Dad you don't mind me asking you these questions do you. Of course not Son how do you learn anything if you don't ask. This chap throws a coin into a Wishing Well then suddenly this little bloke playing a piano appears. The Chap say s I didn't wish for a twelve inch pianist.

The Gulp a Nod to Beer Drinking Magpie Fans eh? I think Magpie should be incorporated in the Name because the Nest will still be associated with Notts County. Because people who are attending a Function there and don't where it is, they'll be told it's on Iremonger Road next to Meadow Lane where Notts County play and their nickname is the Magpies.

So it's been decided that the New Notts Fan Zone is being called the Nest. How Boring they must be something better or exciting more in tune with the Magpies. Going on the Old Internet I've come up with A Conventicle, A Gulp, A Mischief A Tidings or Tribe of Magpies. Any of those have to be better than The Nest. My Favourite one is A Tribe of Magpies. A Fan Zone called the Tribe of Magpies gives the impression of Fan togetherness and the Support of the Players and Club. The Nest Give me a Break. So my fellow PON Members what's your Favourite and Why?

Do you remember when Notts had the idea of bringing a friend to the Lane? Well me and Alan who'd never been to a Football match came to watch the Magpies in action. We were right at the Back of the Kop when Alan says I need to go for a Wee where's the nearest Loo? You don't need the Loo Just Wee in the Wellington boot of that Bloke next to you. Won't he feel it? asked Alan You Didn't I replied.

Now you see it Now you don't Now you see it Now you don't. Sound like a Nudist rolling down a Hill. I said to my Mate Why do you keep Scratching yourself? He replied Because I'm the only One who knows where the Itch is. Two Owls sitting on a Branch one says to the other I've just got engaged, his friend says You Twit To Who? I was at a Mates Birthday party and said to another friend Gary isn't all that Old you know. There was only 27 candles on his cake. Mind you that's only on the Slice I had.

Me Tonto very sorry to hear about your Bad Case Of Dermatitis Kimo Scabby. Tonto walks into a Saloon looking for the Loan Ranger. Under each arm he's got a hissing spitting Nasty Cat. The Lone Ranger looks at him and says No Tonto, I said round up a Posse. I would now like to sing a song made famous by the singer Box Car Willie that is his name not a Disease. Oh Give Me a home were Buffalo's roam and I'll show you house Full Of Cow S***

CONGRATULATIONS . To these Young Ladies You All Have Done Notts County PROUD!!

How about a Shout Out to the Young Ladies at Notts who won a Trophy Final the other Day after being 2-1 down came back and Won 3-2. Hope the club allow the girls to have a Lap of Honour with their Trophy at the Last Home Match of the Season.

The Loan Ranger comes across his friend Tonto laying down with his ear pressed to the ground. What are you up to Tonto Old Friend? asks the Lone Ranger. Stage coach come this way Six horses two black three chestnut and one Grey. Driver had beard and pimple on his left cheek. Stage Guard holds rifle in his left hand he's clean shaven and as broken nose. Inside coach six passengers four men two women. That's amazing Tonto and you can tell this just by having your ear to the ground? Oh No Kimosabie the bloody Coach ran over my Head.

Well I'm Happy to be Proven Wrong. I thought at Best Notts would get a Draw. But the 3-0 victory will give everyone a Boost. But it might have been a totally different game if Harrogate had taken a couple of their chances and had scored their Penalty. But they didn't and it seemed Luck was with Notts for a change. Young Ashby-Hammond had an excellent game and should have been MOTM, it strange but a Keeper never seems to get that honour. There are still glaring problems with the defence which hopefully will be sorted over the Summer. It was nice to see Macca back on the score sheet, with a well taken Penalty and he's now only 4 goals shy of the 30 goal mark. Jodi's mazy run and goal was a joy to watch and it's clear to see why Clubs higher up the Football Pyramid will be looking at him. Jim also proved that like AJ he too can score with his head. But lets not get carried away after past victories Notts have failed to build on their Win and have Lost their following match lets hope they can get a result at Walsall. I'm still Not Convinced about Stuart Maynard but the Guy seemed more Relaxed in his after match interview and he's starting to hopefully settle into his role. If the Magpies can go undefeated till the end of the season, not only will it give the Team confidence for next season but will bring dissatisfied Fans back on side and make Maynard's Task a lot more easier.

I went to one of those Aromatherapists , this chap came in to the room Farted and said that'll be £25. What's got three wheels and goes along a River Bed at 100mph? A Motor Pike and side Carp. There were two Old Guys in an Old Folks home leaning on their Zimmer Frames chatting about the Old Days. One chap says Do you realise if we'd Smoked more Cigarettes, Drunk more Booze Taken more Drugs and had more Women. We'd have Missed all this.

A Mate of mine is an impressionist and a rather Good One, he does a very funny skit about Star Trek. I'd not seen him in awhile but bumped into him the other day. Hello Phil not seen you in awhile where have you been? I asked. I took my act all around Europe, in fact I'm just back from Northern France. Oh Dunkirk? Yes he replied And Spock, Scottie and Doctor McCoy.

I was at the Doctors having a check up and he asked what colour are your Stools? He looked a bit confused when I said they're light brown with a Tartan top. I got home the other day and found I'd locked myself out. Looking through the window I saw the Cat Let me I said. The Cat looked at me and said Me Ow? We've got a New Puppy which the kids sat on a Piece of Sandpaper they then asked How do you feel Puppy, the answer was Ruff. Then there was the Astronaut who declared he was going to land on the Sun. When asked how he was going to achieve this, he replied he was going to Travel at Night.